Membrane sweep and pink lights

Today has been a long and emotional day. We have been at the hospital almost all day long. 
Miss J has spent the day with her beloved grandmother. She got to wear a cute denim dress today, together with a strawberry shirt that my aunt knitted for her first birthday.
She felt SO pretty and was giggling for a long time. She refused taking it off until evening. 

I made a bargain in one of the Facebookgroups I'm in. I found a beautiful jacket that was brand new and had never been worn before. It was only $4. She wore it today for the first time and she absolute loves it. Miss J was twirling in front of the mirror...

My first appointment was at the laboratory. They drew my blood and everything went great! I found this guy hanging around the hospital corridor. I emediatelly called my new found friend mr Bones ;)
I am glad I didn't have to make it through the day alone today. Happy that we had a babysitter for miss J, so that my husband could stay with me. 
He found the green room at the hospital (he he) where he made himself comfortable. 

Mr Björklund has calmed my nerves and we had a nice "fika" (snack) between the appointments. We took the time to sit down and talk in one of the hospital cafeterias.

Well, I was a nervous wreck when the time came to meet the doctor who's gonna deliver our babygirl. I thought that I would have to "make my case" to her again. Instead it was the absolute opposit that happened! Puh!

It went good at the doctors appointment today. We agreed on going in to the delivery on Tuesday the coming week for a membrane sweep. That's something I've never done before! My OB said that it just might jiggle things along. If it doesn't have the desired effect we're rupturing the membranes on Thursday (most likely) next week. So everything is very exciting. The baby is going to be approaching 4 kg by then, so she'll be big! 
The doctors had been reading up on our story, taken into consideration each others thoughts on the matter (the obstetrician, the anaesthesiologist, the paediatrician and the head of the maternity ward) and all agreed that an induction is medically necessary to prevent this baby being born injured.
I am nervous about it all, because it'll take a lot of character and strength on my part. But I trust God to carry me through this as well!


But for now I'm 37 weeks along and still loving being pregnant! I talk to my baby every day and pray for her health. I spend time "listening in" on how our two souls communicate. That is such a powerful thing. I love her so much already <3

I went to the hospital chapel afterwords and took some time to think and pray. My experiences from last time giving birth are horrifying and I still struggle with what happened.
To see your baby that extremely ill, fighting for her life, in a bed at the ICU. Holding her tiny hand in yours. To beg and plead with God to let her pull through. To get one bad news after the other. To come to the point where you simply can't go on any longer and then just cling to eachother and God... But you still go on, because it's your baby laying there - Fighting... Struggling... 

And then I felt an enormous peace come into my soul. It is well with my soul! Whatever will happen, however this will turn out... I will know that I have done absolutely everything in my power for my baby girl to be born safe. 
So I continue to hold my hands on her, feeling her move around through the thin and stretched skin on my belly. And I shower her with peace and love. We'll do this together, her and me! Daddy will be there for us both. And it'll be ok. I have peace now! It is well with my soul.

I have started dreaming and planning ahead for this very special Christmas. Here in Sweden they normally decorate the Christmas tree just a day or two before Christmas. That is the tradition. But I want want to enjoy the season much longer. And this year we're gonna be one more family member dancing around the tree.
So I have talked to my husband about maybe soon getting our pink (of course) Christmastree and putting it up. That would be such a joy to me! We "just" have to decide on where to put it... I absolutely love the holiday season! 

This is how I some day want to decorate our house for the holiday season. I absolutely love those Christmas lights! 
I almost can't wait!



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